


achilles heel

by scribbleddreaming



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, although this is all speculation, possible spoilers for Age of Ultron
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-02
Updated: 2014-11-02
Packaged: 2018-02-23 20:16:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2554202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scribbleddreaming/pseuds/scribbleddreaming
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes he would love to show the world who Steve Rogers really was, cut his guts open and give everyone a little peek inside, to see the guilt and the regrets festered like old, infected wounds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	achilles heel

**Author's Note:**

> this is something i randomly whipped up because i was bored. it's based on the sneak peek of avengers: age of ultron shown at the marvel event, so everything else in here is pure speculation and me dreaming silly dreams. this is probably really out of character but i like me a bit darker steve sometimes. in essence, this is just a short, sad, dumb little piece i wrote, not edited in any big way.

 

_"I don’t trust a guy without a dark side. Call me old-fashioned.“ _

Steve wanted to scoff, laugh derisively at Tony’s surprising display of naiveté. He sometimes wondered what the world must think of him; Steve Rogers, Captain America, the eternal boy-scout. As if he were really what the history books made him, some clean, hollow symbol of purity and all that is Good and American.  

But if there had been anything Steve had learned in his life is that to be who he was, the leader, the symbol, Captain America, meant to plunge your hands deep into the filth and hope you can still look in the mirror afterwards. It meant letting innocent men die, sending them to a sure death, bringing them death by your own hands. It meant failing the one person who had always come through for you, by being too slow and damning them in the process to lifetimes of misery. Sometimes he would love to show the world who Steve Rogers really was, cut his guts open and give everyone a little peek inside, to see the guilt and the regrets festered like old, infected wounds. It would be gratifying to make people remember for just a few seconds that he is just a man, capable of weakness and self-interest just like everyone else.

_"Well, let’s just say you haven’t seen it yet.“ _

If only they knew, all of them, that he would raze the world, leave it scorched to a cinder if it meant getting Bucky back. Every day Steve had to conclude with the crushing defeat of not having found Bucky made him colder, more frustrated than ever before. The Scarlet Witch had shown him alright; had shown him enough tempting pictures to make him doubt, only to succeed she should have picked other ones. If she had shown him Bucky, back in his life, in his arms, in his bed, that might have been enough to drive Steve over the edge. If she had shown him a time before Captain America and the war, when it was only Bucky and him in Brooklyn, huddled up together, laughing and kissing like innocent, naive boys in love do, she could have brought him to his knees, begging for it to be reality and doing anything to make it happen. She had missed her shot. Steve was looking towards the future now, a future he would build on the mass of his own failures, hoping against hope that Bucky will find his way back to him, forgive him and love him again. 

He wondered sometimes what would happen if he found Bucky, or if Bucky found him. Would the Avengers try to bring him into custody or imprison him? Steve knew he could never let that happen, even if all that was left of Bucky was just a semblance of a human being, even if he really was just the weapon everyone made him out to be. He’d never let Bucky go again, they have to know that, would never let them harm him in any way, even if it meant Steve had to fight them. It pains him to know that this is the most likely thing to happen, that they won’t see anything in Bucky but the Winter Soldier and Steve won’t have a choice. He can see the dark road ahead of him, knowing he’s helpless to stop it; he knows this must all come to pass and his allies, his friends, will turn to foes. They are already falling apart and the only thing keeping them together at this point is the danger lurking. Bucky will break them apart, he knows that, because his loyalties will always lie first and foremost with his best friend, his lover, his everything. Steve wishes he could change what will happen, but he’s suspended like a fly in a spider’s web, futile to stop it. 

None of them know Steve, not really, because if they did, they would know that Bucky is Steve’s dark side, his weak point and his Achilles heel, his damnation and salvation all at once. Now that he wasn’t an empty grave and missed opportunities anymore, there was no way Steve would stop until Bucky would be back with him, no matter what it takes.

 


End file.
